The Eagle Blog

Coping with Anger

We all have things that we work to improve and one of my failings is an ability to get a little hot under the collar. OK I will ‘fess up’, I have a temper… but now that I am old and mellow no-one would be able to tell! However … back when I was young and rash, I was not always this good at containing my temper

I thought it would be a good topic for a blog so I went to visit Michael Paquin’s website to see if he had any tips on the subject. Michael’s company provides coaching services and produces tips that I regular share here.

Here are some tips from him on how to avoid losing your temper and how to deal with it.

To Avoid It:

1. Know Yourself. The more you know about what triggers your anger the more you can control it. Asking for feedback and journaling are good habits that can help.
2. Plan Your Life. Make sure you have a personal plan written out with a good solid strategy of balanced goals that you feel great about. The more confident you are about where you are going the least likely you will let others affect your trip.
3. Expect Surprises. Develop your intuition and learn how to mitigate risks.

To Deal With It:

1. Recognize It. Notice what happens to you when you get angry. Your voice gets louder, your ears get warmer or your heart beats faster.
2. Rise Above It. Take a deep breath and move away from where your buttons are being pressed. This can be done mentally or physically.
3. Put It To Bed. If the matter requires attention, do it objectively. Ask for help, if required. Always make a habit of learning from your experiences.

Obviously anger is not appropriate in the workplace and will have a negative impact in most situations. I used to say that it just demonstrated my passion … but really that is a cop out. Anger is a destructive emotion and those of us with a tendency to demonstrate anger need to find ways to handle it.


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4 thoughts on “Coping with Anger

  1. I have always viewed anger as a mutli dimensional beast. I’ve done some of my best work when truly angry (be it @ situations or people). I recently had a conversation with a friend wherein we were discussing our children / youth and the overweheling lethargy seen today. I mentioned that a certain daughter (whom shall remain nameless) was in the throws of anger and I was standing in the onslaught wishing I could only channel this energy for good. One of the conclusions (be it right or wrong) of that conversation, was that our children are missing the proverbial ‘fire in the belly’ (is that passion or can it sometimes be anger the drives people).

    Thoughts for the stew,
    Ian

    P.S. I too, am on the lifelong mission to handle my anger better (wishing to channel my own anger, all the time…)

  2. I have always viewed anger as a mutli dimensional beast. I’ve done some of my best work when truly angry (be it @ situations or people). I recently had a conversation with a friend wherein we were discussing our children / youth and the overweheling lethargy seen today. I mentioned that a certain daughter (whom shall remain nameless) was in the throws of anger and I was standing in the onslaught wishing I could only channel this energy for good. One of the conclusions (be it right or wrong) of that conversation, was that our children are missing the proverbial ‘fire in the belly’ (is that passion or can it sometimes be anger the drives people).

    Thoughts for the stew,
    Ian

    P.S. I too, am on the lifelong mission to handle my anger better (wishing to channel my own anger, all the time…)

  3. Ian … I hear ya on the need for passion! I agree that passion and anger are close cousins … and everyone should have some “fire in the belly”. Perhaps I would have been better to focus on the positive aspects of passion as opposed to the negative aspects of a misdirected anger? I think the point is to avoid “beating up” on those around us because we are angry about something! Thanks for taking time to comment!

  4. Ian … I hear ya on the need for passion! I agree that passion and anger are close cousins … and everyone should have some “fire in the belly”. Perhaps I would have been better to focus on the positive aspects of passion as opposed to the negative aspects of a misdirected anger? I think the point is to avoid “beating up” on those around us because we are angry about something! Thanks for taking time to comment!

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